December 3, 2012

An update and overdue hello

Hello, hello.

It's been awhile and now it's December. One of my favourite times of the year. December makes me so very happy. And I could use some happy thoughts.

Because lately, things are hard. My mom's health is not good. I'm far from family. And on top of that, I'm struggling with my wandering gnome life. When I make a new gem of a friend, they will (I feel) inevitably leave me. (I have lots to be thankful for living in a great country but a serious downside is friends moving away/returning to their home/travelling etc.) Because they do. Or sometimes I leave them. (I know these kinds of friends are life long friends and always there but having a good great friend close to you is so much more fun.) Having a built in partner in crime/sit in silence so you're never alone/fill your day with random texts, notes, reminders, great stories, great laughs...? You know the kind I'm sure. I have only met a small handful of these gems and I'm so far from them. And when I could really use one to lean on, even just to hear them say how much things suck, suddenly the distance seems endless.

So blogging has been a challenge. Trying not to be down and out, not be too sad, and also when life brings it, not be too happy. It's a balancing act of guilt, fear, and life.

I want life to have happy thoughts even when there are struggles. So I'm here, even if I'm struggling on how to write about silly things that make me happy like, how much I love my Christmas tree, when there are bigger unhappy things facing someone I love so much. See, even typing it feels like such an unbalance.

But I want to blog, I love this little community and corner I have. And I want to focus on appreciating the small things that make me happy. Because it's always the small things. Day by day. Step by step.

It's summer Christmastime here in New Zealand, and here are some small things that make me happy:


  • White lights on a Christmas a tree
  • Cold glass of white sav blanc on a hot sunny day
  • Sitting on the patio with my feet up watching the waves, or clouds
  • Having a cuddly cat be my hot water bottle and keep me warm
  • Having friends over for dinner, cooking them something tasty that fills their bellies
  • Hot, hot showers
  • Cold crisp grapes
  • Iron free summer dresses
  • Flip flops, jandals (to-may-toe, to-mah-toe)
  • Pumpkin spiced coffee
  • A text from a friend saying hi
  • A call (or email, hey I'm long distance) from family saying hi
  • When Kev makes me dinner, and fusses with all the pots, pans, and cooking techniques I tell him to use
  • A good hair with 2 day old hair
  • When friends make me dairy free treats when they're having everyone over and know I can only eat dairy free (new and a challenge!)
  • A photo calendar of my adorable nephew
  • Mail! Letters, cards, especially the Christmas kind
  • Santa in a convertible
  • Hearing that my mom is having a good day, and is happy too.









3 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom. I will send good thoughts her way. I love Christmas, too - nothing beats twinkly lights and pumpkin spice lattes. Also, relaxing outside and watching waves doesn't sound too shabby ;)

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  2. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom :-( I hope that things look up a little bit for you and you're able to find a kindred spirit who sticks around!

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  3. im super sorry to hear about your mom's health :( i hope she has a wonderful and comfortable christmas.

    and i hope you get to drink plenty of cold wine on those hot days ;)

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So glad you wandered by!